Something Like A Dream

Something Like A Dream

I got turned around

On April 25^th

On a walk to no place

With my eyes half open

It was the day after a good day

And I floated unconscious

And in 24 hours

I had forgotten myself

This new found numbness

Was less cold than expected

And it felt like sleeping

But my legs were still moving

I don’t think I noticed

The swollen clouds moving

Or the pouring rain pouring

Or that my shoes were all wet

And I sat on a park bench

And I swear I saw Jesus

But it could have Buddha

And it could have been Elvis

And I asked him, “How is it?”

He said, “What have you done here?”

He said, “Where are the children?”

He said, “My minds not right”

And I walked to a classroom

But no one was teaching

And though the doctor was talking

No one was learning

So I asked her a question

I asked, “What do you do here”

But she just kept on talking

As if her words were scripture

And I went looking through windows

And I think I saw Nietzsche

He was in a straightjacket

He was praying Hail Marys 

And I needed a nap

Because my eyelids were heavy

And my legs, they were rubber

And my shoes were not dry

So I fell on a futon

In a room full of people

They were screaming and laughing

While I slept like a baby

When I woke I was older

And my hair was much longer

But I didn’t cut it

Because I couldn’t find scissors

And all of a sudden

I missed the ocean

I missed the mountains

I missed my brothers

And the numbness got colder

I guess it wasn’t numbness

And I guess it was over

So I guess I was cold

So I reached for jacket

Or a hat or some mittens

But I only found tank tops

And a copy of Dude Ranch

And at once it was sunny

And I was out at the campground

And I was walking toward Lauren
But she was looking beyond me

So I got in a paddleboat

But the waters were raging

I got knocked in the water

And I spilled my last beer

So I reached for the dock

But I just got a splinter

And I didn’t have tweezers

And I didn’t have patience.

I was swallowing water

I was reaching my hands out

And kicking and screaming

But they just let me drown

 I woke up in a safe place

Full of boxes of records

And it smelled like the 9^th grade

And it looked like Belle’s basement

And I saw Belle there crying

And I asked her, “What is it?”

She said that the doctors

Prescribed her the pills

And she was shivering  always

So I gave her my jacket

Leather sleeves but no letter

I never made the team

And I told her I loved her

But I had to be going

I had to keep chasing

My lost good vibration

And I passed by Bob Dylan

On my way to the outside

And I couldn’t make noises

But my moth was still moving

But he was holding a pistol

And a bottle of whiskey

And he said it was over

He said please don’t think twice

So I climbed to the rooftop

And I sat like an Indian

And I lit up a cigarette

And sang “Lost In The Flood”

And the sunlight was fleeting

So I stood like a soldier

And I thought of the evils

Clouds, Distance, War

And my fear overwhelmed me

So I stared down at the streetlights

And I screamed it like Andy

“I am fine. I am fine”

But I didn’t believe me

And I forgot I was crying

And I forgot I was breathing

And I forgot to keep trying

And I woke up In my basement

Which I swore was dorm room

When I first started sleeping

But I guess I was home

But the word home confused me

So I picked up my lighter

And set shit on fire

And  put none of it out

But this wasn’t a movie

And I was bound to go crazy

If I kept chasing something

That had never existed

So I fell out of love with

The girls I was loving

And I began to breathe heavy

And I kissed them goodnight

And I began a new life

On West Egg with Daisy

And I threw the big parties

And I died in a pool

And I thought I was Gatsby

And I thought I was a mystery

And I thought I was a martyr

But I had it all wrong

So I started it over

And I played the dark records

I played Elliot Smith

I played Iron and Wine

And the songs made me tired

And the songs made me anxious

And the songs made me feel cold

And the songs made me do it

And just before I hit pavement

I woke in a cold sweat

And I couldn’t remember

What I was writing this for.